Saturday, March 28, 2009

Cleaning Hell

As many of you know, I was called to my dad's house because he was taken to the ER. He had pneumonia. I left in a hurry on Wed and am still in GR with him. My mom was a hoarder. Really, really bad. The house was a total mess. After she passed, about 8 years ago, I had done a fair amount of cleaning but it only made a small dent. He has not kept it up. My younger sister that has cerebral palsy lives with him. My older sister is mentally retarded and is also schizophrenic. She also has manic depression that has not been controlable with drugs so she has to undergo ECT (Electro convulsive therapy). It is the only thing that keeps her under control. So now you all know my history (I know you are saying TMI!!, LOL) so the point of the was realeased from the hospital today, YEAH!! God has softened his heart to my cleaning (cuz in the past he always got mad when I did anything, so thanks for your prayers!!) I tried to break it to him gently while we were in the hospital waiting for discharge and he balked at first but finally realized that it was necessary.
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So as we were waiting to go home, my DH, and DS were on their way to grandpa's house as were DD2 and her BF, Brad. We all met up and got our cleaning on! DH and DD1 worked for awhile in the kitchen, then we stopped for lunch. So DH cleaned in the kitchen for over 6 hours! DD2 and Brad cleaned both bathrooms and then helped DD1 and I clean my older sister's room (where DD1 wants to be able to stay eventually). We worked our ---off but we got about a fourth of the room finished. So now for some of the photos! Please don't judge us!
Here is DD1 and DH in the kitchen. She said,"How many mixing bowls do you need?" He says,"7, I need 7". At which time she calls him a name! LOL
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Inside view of a cupboard in the kitchen:
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Isn't this what you all use your dishwasher for??
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I have finally convinced him that he needs to get a new dishwasher and teach my sister how to use it. Steralize your dishes!! He told me that he was putting chocolate milk in a styriofoam cup, rinsing it out and re-using it, YUCK!!
This is a photo of my sister's room, but we didn't think to take a true before photo, this was after several hours of cleaning!
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While cleaning the cleaning supply closet we found some treasurer's: do any of you have underware in a jar??
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How about my dad's corner?
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The family room
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Here is the dining room table
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Quick oats from 1979 anyone??
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From back in the day when ice cube trays were metal.
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So get the point, right?? Lest you think I am so cold hearted, I just adore my dad but I am physically and mentally exhausted!! It was so cute today when brad and Kelsey were here, my dad had a new victim person to talk to and Brad was so patient and kind to my dad! Poor Brad, he scrubbed toilets and cleaned like a champ. He is a keeper!! Dad loved him too.

My uncle tom (my dad's brother) came by and helped me this week too. His sons have a business with a dumpster 9my heros!!) so my uncle Tom cam by and took a few garbage bags yesterday for me (15). Then today we made another 35 bags of garbage and 7 bags for the charity shop (not to mention several boxes for a garage sale that my DH wants us to have!) Seriously, hardly a dent. So discouraging!! Dad kept apologizing for us having to "help" him like this so I just hugged him and told him we are here because we love him and want to help. I know he is embarassed but it soooo needs to be done! I am happy we got such a good start. DH thinks I need to take a week off and come back and have the garage sale at the end of the week. He also wants me to Ebay everything, but I just don't have the time.

I know this is long and I appreciate all your support and prayers!! You have NO idea how much!!!


Chookyblue...... said...

wow I don't envy you at all. Helped do my Grandparents house and it was no where near as full as your and OMG we put far to much in one house...........this is a good reminder that we should THROW more out way sooner..........

Faith said...

My spirit is with you Pam and your family helping you to clean and help out. My Jim and Rachel is a hoarder too and when ever theres something I cant stand and try to throw away, it comes back out again to haunt me lol.
Couldnt Chris and Thadd be incharge of the ebay thing seeing as youre so busy?

Mrs. Goodneedle said...

Prayers continue. I'm still giggling about the underwear "preserves". Hey, you never know when you may need a pair and you happen to be in the kitchen, right? You are a HUGE blessing to your family!

Michaela said...

You are in my thoughts. Your dad will be so happy when everything is done. You are amazing ( and your family) to undertake all this work. Great job!

Vicki H. said...

oh yes, I had to do this twice last year with Mil and Fil. It was so overwhelming words didn't describe it. They lived in small apartments but the situation was like your photos. Keep your head even and a tender heart, it will be done soon with such loving help.

MichelleB said...

Wow, Pam. Thanks for the pictures. The pictures show what one can never really explain. It is an unenviable task, and your dad is so lucky that you are willing to help him and not part of the problem, too! Sending good thoughts your way.

Anne said...

Hi Pam,
I wish that you had called me I could have come and helped you. You would have just had to tell me how to get there.
Do not worry about showing what had to be cleaned. We all have the same situation.
Also, I am divorced. My ex was bipolar. I had to put him in the hospital many times. They never offered the EST. He is on many medicines and all they do is let him sleep most of the time. We all have skeltons in our closets.
I am praying for you and your family. You are such and wonderful person and wonderful friend. I am so glad that God brought us together.

sophie said...

Hang in there, Pam. your Dad is so lucky to have you and your DH.

Mary-Kay C. said...

Your family is so lucky to have you in their lives. And I thought I had it bad with my oldest brother being a schizophrenic. Hopefully this week will be a better one for you. Hang in there!

West Michigan Quilter said...

My heart goes out to you. You have so much on your plate. Your family is so lucky to have you. You are a saint. Couldn't help but giggle at the dishwasher and the undies in a jar. At least you still have your humor. Take care and God bless. Call me if you want me to help.

Unknown said...

What a painful reminder: MY MOM has rooms like that too.

Please take care of yourself.

dianne said...

i kept meaning to leave you a comment on your last post about it being easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission ... i just went through the same thing with my mother ... it took me SIX WEEKS (while she was in rehab) to clear out her one-bedroom apartment ... and my sister's basement is full of the stuff that she refused to let go ... i lost track of how many trips i made to the dumpster - i would take a load out and meet one of her fellow oldsters dragging the previous load back in to his own stash of stuff ... unreal ... she reminds me every time i talk with her that i threw out and gave away all of her memories ...... i can top the oatmeal - she still had the bottle of cayenne pepper sauce that she used to put on my tongue if i forgot to say "please" when i was little ... remember to breathe.

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Your dad and mine must be long lost twins that were seperated at birth! I feel for you! I went through the same thing! Hang in there! God Bless you. The "pickled" panties are a hoot!

Mary Johnson said...

If we didn't move every few years and have to clean out -- I would be in bad shape too. I'm a pack rat always afraid I'm going to need something....and my pot cabinet looks pretty jumbled right now too!

I know it's hard but it's nice of all of you to jump in and help.

Elaine Adair said...

Uh oh .. been there, done that!

YOU are a treasure to coordinate this much-needed job.

Stay strong, and so glad your Dad is not seriously hurt.

KZK said...

I'm so glad your dad is home! You've got to be exhausted! Prayers continuing for you!

The Calico Cat said...

While my grandma's place is not bad at all (I'm a bit generous) especially since she statered to get rid of stuff...

that can of "Toxic" ice cube tray wax, reminded my of the tube of chap-ette (or was it chap-eez) that I saw at her house yesterday - the tube is metal!

good luck & take all the help you can get.

Brenda said...

Wow, I'm glad you had some help, but I can't imagine how exhausted you must be! You will be blessed many, many times over - watch for those blessings to come!

Very Mary said...

You have a heart of gold (and panties in a jar as your reward)...

Natalie, the Chickenblogger said...

Strangely, this post makes me hopeful and actually renews my faith.
I always knew you were good, but this is evidence that you are way beyond good. God bless you.

Tanya said...

My father's place was in a similar state but I never did offer to clean it for him. I just didn't see him enough. For my mom, I offer but she just gets upset with me and I hate to ruffle feathers with so little time with her... Maybe this summer.

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